Book Review - Why I didn’t say anything: The Sheldon Kennedy Story
July 5th 2008 02:03
by
Sheldon Kennedy with James Grainger
Skating on ice since the age of two, Sheldon Kennedy showed promise on the ice hockey field. As Sheldon passed from his early years into his teens a considerable deterioration of his parents relationship developed. Being sent to a hockey camp with his brother changed Sheldon’s life. He began honing his skating talents, eventually making professional ice hockey his career, and he met a coach who became his hero. This same ice hockey coach sexually abused Sheldon. Sadly the abuse continued for years and the unrelenting pain of it has lasted a lifetime so far.
With sexual abuse at its core this testimonial tends to breeze over the issue. Every reader seems expected to already fully understand the complex emotional baggage getting packed away into the emotional suitcase of a vulnerable minor under such circumstances. The reality of sexual abuse being about power and control rather than sexual gratification or sexuality isn’t fully dealt with, which becomes frustrating. Certainly there are myths about masculinity, sport and sexuality eroded by Sheldon’s story. The abuser is not drawn as same-sex attracted or effeminate, and the violently macho world of ice hockey is a far cry from the worlds of creativity or self expression where stereotypical models of such incidents tend to be projected.
Clearly not an easy book to write, it is difficult to read at times since it doesn’t provide sufficient detail, research outcomes or detailed references. It would be a more satisfying read if there were stronger practical references drawn. However the book only sets out to tell Sheldon’s story and that is ultimately what it does. Male sexual assault/long term abuse is a subject requiring more than this tome to address it adequately, nevertheless Sheldon’s story may assist someone somewhere. I recommend it as a discussion starter.
David Jobling
Sheldon Kennedy with James Grainger
Skating on ice since the age of two, Sheldon Kennedy showed promise on the ice hockey field. As Sheldon passed from his early years into his teens a considerable deterioration of his parents relationship developed. Being sent to a hockey camp with his brother changed Sheldon’s life. He began honing his skating talents, eventually making professional ice hockey his career, and he met a coach who became his hero. This same ice hockey coach sexually abused Sheldon. Sadly the abuse continued for years and the unrelenting pain of it has lasted a lifetime so far.
With sexual abuse at its core this testimonial tends to breeze over the issue. Every reader seems expected to already fully understand the complex emotional baggage getting packed away into the emotional suitcase of a vulnerable minor under such circumstances. The reality of sexual abuse being about power and control rather than sexual gratification or sexuality isn’t fully dealt with, which becomes frustrating. Certainly there are myths about masculinity, sport and sexuality eroded by Sheldon’s story. The abuser is not drawn as same-sex attracted or effeminate, and the violently macho world of ice hockey is a far cry from the worlds of creativity or self expression where stereotypical models of such incidents tend to be projected.
Clearly not an easy book to write, it is difficult to read at times since it doesn’t provide sufficient detail, research outcomes or detailed references. It would be a more satisfying read if there were stronger practical references drawn. However the book only sets out to tell Sheldon’s story and that is ultimately what it does. Male sexual assault/long term abuse is a subject requiring more than this tome to address it adequately, nevertheless Sheldon’s story may assist someone somewhere. I recommend it as a discussion starter.
David Jobling
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